Saturday, July 25, 2009

Where did you learn about sex?

People assume that parents or schools are going to be where you first learn about sex...but that hardly ever seems to be the case. When I was 11 I had many slightly older online friends thanks to a Pokemon forum (ha) who thoroughly corrupted me. By age 13 I was giggling at goatse, by age 14 I was the resident sex guru - before taking any official sex ed class. And I don't mean the kid who spreads misinformation about sex - I really knew what I was talking about. It was this fascinating area to me, and I couldn't stop reading every sex information and sex advice thing I could find online. I wanted to understand as much about it as possible in a scientific way - it didn't even cross my mind to start trying things out on a practical level for a few more years. It was just another topic to learn, just like history or biology. I didn't even quite understand how taboo it was in America.

I take great pride in that my Sexpert status has stayed with me - I still have people coming to me with their random questions.

Where did you first learn about sex? And how the hell is it that I somehow thoroughly educated myself using the internet, but your average American teen uses the internet just to learn stupid rumors (can't get pregnant on your period, etc)? Kids these days. Get off my lawn, etc.

This is post 36 of 49 of Blogathon. Pledge a donation to the Secular Student Alliance here.


  1. Sure. I'll bite on this one. Like I have everything else tonight. It's 4 AM here, almost.

    Okay. I don't know where I learned about sex exactly, but I would be willing to bet it was the playground. My mom explained things in great detail when I was 10. And then we had very good sex ed teachers in school. They taught us everything you would want a kid to know. Most of it I had heard already.

    But I really learned a lot of sex ed, and sexual theory, when I volunteered to take notes for a sex offender rehabilitation therapy in return for a $2500 bursary. That was one of the scariest, most informative and most rewarding things I've ever done in my life. And learning how people break sexual constraints teaches you more about those things than you could ever know. Every single type of myth you can think of debunked, every single type of thinking pattern discussed.

    Yeah. That's where I really learned about sex.

    Oh, and my clandestine meetings with a 35 year old woman when I was in early university.

  2. *shakes cane* Kids theeese daaaays!

    But yeah. It was pretty much the same for me, except it was dirty jokes in the schoolyard that started my curiosity. Then, I started searching the internet for answers.

    I've pretty much got the same position with my friends in meatspace. Except I'm also Dating Advice Guy, since apparently I'm the best choice there. That's terrifying.

  3. My earliest memories of talking about sex came from the playground, or playing with the neighbours... <_<
    My actual education about sex came largely from the wonderful radio program(for it's time) Sex with Sue, and browsing books and the internet(which sucked back then!). Sue Johanson's retired from doing TV and radio nowadays I think, but she still gives talks at various places I believe.

    There were sex education classes at school too, but eh... While it's nice to know more about fallopian tubes, I don't think I was alone in my classes in having only a fairly detached interest in them. Would have been nice if the classes also actually dealt with issues that anyone CARED about at that age, or would care about in the next couple years.

    Going over the basics of ovulation, fertilization, implantation, consequences of any of this going wrong(ectopic pregnancies)... is good. But I found my sex ed classes spent a bit more time on them than was called for. Probably because the teacher realized that it was "safe" territory. That they wouldn't get in much trouble for discussing hormone cycles whereas discussion of actual SEX would have been riskier.

    meh. Kids that wanted to learn about the other aspects of sex education still could, but one had to go out on one's own to get that info. It wasn't presented very well where I went to school =(

  4. I grew up on a farm, so my parents gave me "the talk" fairly early on. (Hurrah for "Where Did I Come From?")

    Then I found a playboy in a park across the road from church after sunday school. (Guess which one I learnt more from!)

    I didn't have this resource growing up (old man-man is old) but Scarlet Teen should be available to teenagers everywhere!

  5. I'm sixteen and haven't gotten "the talk" yet. *facepalm* I knew the basics since about fourth grade. My mom teaches biology, and when I was a younger little nerd and out of reading material, I'd pull out a biology textbook or two and hunker down. And once in a while, I'd happen to flip to the back chapters, the ones with the interesting diagrams.

    And then, there is the Internet. Wikipedia, honestly. Of course, AP Biology covered the topic in excruciating detail. So now I have a pretty thorough knowledge of such matters--as thorough as it can get without actually having experienced it. Yay.

  6. first real knowledge of periods and nocturnal emissions for me came from reading Leviticus at age 10. Yeah. Not recommended.